Don’t believe the chocolate commercials; you won’t be getting your woman all hot and bothered with a nice box of chocolates. Life just isn’t that simple.

I’m here to help!

This post is for all the men out there who are searching for that perfect Valentine’s Day gift or activity. Okay let’s be honest. This post is really for men who can’t think beyond the box of the chocolates, but would rather not piss off their special lady.

Good (read – sufficient enough to avoid any fights or create discontent)

1. Dinner reservations – most guys are savvy enough to know that trying to eat out on Vday is impossible without a reservation. Don’t wait till Wednesday. Check out restaurant reviews on Yelp (if you’re a San Diego resident you can email me for ideas) and make that reservation tonight. You’ll get added bonus points for picking something not quintessentially associated with Valentine’s Day (that’s too easy), but instead associated with a key moment in the relationship. Where were you when you two first kissed or decided to be exclusive? Women like to know that their man has an emotional heartbeat. Help her to find your sensitivity pulse by taking the initiative to arrange dinner plans that are reminiscent of a great memory.
2. Send flowers – this is easy and obvious, but it’s still better than a box of chocolates. Since Vday is a Thursday, have the flowers sent to her work. This only works if the relationship is serious, though, because some women (including moi) don’t want my coworkers to know about my personal relationships too soon; it makes me feel exposed, especially since everyone always oohs and aahs over the flowers.
3. Make your own basket – baskets with chocolates, candles, and beauty products are a dime a dozen, but with a little more work you can create your own personalized basket for her. Start by going to Michael’s and picking up a basket, then pick up a few of her favorite products whether they be chocolate (try upscale places like Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory for fun and tasty alternatives to traditional boxed chocolates), bath and body (The Body Shop), or home decor items (Illuminations), finally dress up the basket with tissue paper (for height), decorative ribbon, and a nice card.

Great (read – a little more effort is always appreciated)

1. Take her shopping (before dinner) – find out her favorite store, pick her up from work on Vday and take her there. Instruct her to select any outfit she would like to wear to dinner (or after), and foot the bill. Of course this activity is all about making her feel sexy and desirable, so if you think your capable of saying something to destroy this mood, this is not an option for you. Major bonus points if you let her dress you for the evening too.
2. Pamper her vanity – (disclaimer: this works best on weekends) if your woman likes to feel glamorous make arrangements for her to get her makeup done (you can call the MAC counter of any Nordies and set this up yourself – it’s free if you buy product), her hair styled (she probably has the number to her stylist in her planner), and her nails done. She’ll feel beautiful, confident, and appreciated.
3. Take her wine tasting – This is such a great alternative to the dinner reservation staple, because it can be extremely romantic if done right. If you happen to be in San Diego, Temecula Valley’s wine country is pretty phenomenal. Wine tasting is affordable, intimate, cultural, fun, and social. If you’ve got the money to spend, you might want to rent a limo or reserve a room. Bonus points if you plan ahead and bring a variety of grapes, cheese, and crackers to ensure proper sustenance.

Fabulous (read – a whole lot of effort but satisfaction guaranteed)

1. Combine 1 idea from the Great category with 1 idea from the Good category. For example, start the day off by sending her flowers to her job, and include a personalized card that let’s her know you’ll be escorting her off for a fabulous night of wine tasting and conversation.
2. Schedule a couple’s spa session – This may seem a little on the cheesy side, but most women (despite what you’ve seen on TV) rarely pamper themselves, and have probably never experienced a couple’s message. Odds are that she’ll be thrilled to create new memories with you. For locating a spa near you, you can use Yelp or get recommendations from her female friends.
3. Turn your bedroom into a Valentine’s Day wonderland – This requires the most work because in order to achieve the full effect you’ll need to purchase new sheets (reds, whites, pinks (pastels are great)), window coverings, a myriad of candles (with complimenting scents), roses or rose petals (for the rose pedals on the bed effect), and you’ll need to get a female to help you put everything together. The ambiance should be romantic and ethereal, which means that red everywhere is just not going to accomplish the right effect.

As I said before, I’m here to help so you can always email me if you need ideas that are more specific to your woman. Some easy alternatives to the options above include a comedy show, a burlesque show, a hotel reservation, or dinner cruise.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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